So, I think I've reached a low point. Today as I was driving past Panera I decided to fill up my car with gas and drive to California. Because I am not above second guessing rash ideas and am particularly fond of iced green tea, I decided to go to Panera first. While at Panera, Google informed me that it would take 1 day and 2 hours to get away from here. In the RAV, this would equal about 339 dollars worth of gas. 339 dollars and 26 hours of driving would be totally worth it. It's tempting. I could hide in Simi Valley for a few days, or weeks, or months. Maybe even forever.
But contrary to popular belief, I am more mature than that. I am not going to run away again. I am going to stay here and compulsively chew gum, and listen to this and also this. And then I'll keep writing about things that frustrate me. Then I'm going to go night swimming and everything will be okay.
-buelsy (don't wanna get with the program)
Saturday, May 31, 2008
an exercise in running away.
Monday, April 07, 2008
weekends come and go.
When I was younger I was a huge fan of the Anne of Green Gables series (there, it's out!). One of my favorite Anneisms was "I am drowning in the depths of despair." I've used that wonderful, overly dramatic phrase a number of times in the past decade, and each time it has been anything but an accurate description of my life. But it occurred to me this morning that right now, I may in fact be drowning in the depths of despair. No drama, no over-exaggeration involved. I just spent an entire weekend doing... nothing. I mean, in all fairness to myself, I did do laundry and some major anxiety cleaning, which can both be considered fairly productive actions. I also went to downtown Main Street with some people on Friday night and ended up finding an apartment to sublet this summer. But I did not work on my thesis nor did I do any homework. Drowning, people, drowning.
We leave for NFA in a little over a week (GO PANTS!). After I get back, there are only a little over two weeks left of school. Point being, everything is happening too fast for me to be philandering with cleaning supplies on a Sunday afternoon.
-buelsy (needs to kick it into high gear)
